Cheeseburger Fries

So... in the last few years of my dad's life, he was on a partially restricted diet and was forced to eat *gasp* healthy, low-fat foods. Bacon cheeseburgers were one of the things we always teased him about (because turkey burgers with turkey bacon are just not the same)


A couple of nights before he passed away, my stepmom snuck (sneaked?) him out of the hospital and took him for a burger and a milkshake. When my sister and I flew out to be with her after he died, we had burgers in his honor. Pretty much every time I have a bacon cheeseburger (more often than I am willing to admit), I think about my dad.


It was a year ago today that we lost him so I planned on making bacon cheeseburgers, but realized a bit too late that the ground beef I bought was 80% 20%, which meant it was going to fall apart while I was cooking it.


It's January, so I figured I could make a cheeseburger soup... of course, this is Southern California, so it's 70 degrees today and who wants soup when it's 70?


I decided to make my grossly American version of local specialty, asada fries.


1 pound-ish of ground beef
a couple tablespoons of diced onion
1 bag of frozen fries
shredded cheese
chopped iceberg lettuce
chopped tomato
diced/crumbled bacon
ketchup
mustard
salt and pepper

While you're cooking the fries, brown up the ground beef. About halfway through the cooking process, add the onions, some salt and pepper and a couple of squeezes of ketchup and mustard.

On a comfy little bed of fries, put a scoop of the ground beef, a handful of lettuce and tomato, sprinkle it with cheese and bacon and top it with a drizzle of ketchup.

It's not a pretty meal, but it's a nice little twist on the bacon cheeseburger portion of your food pyramid.

(not pictured: a mess on a plate. A delicious mess on a plate)

Super-Lazy and Semi-Healthy Crock Pot Chili

I know it's not a traditional chili, but it's semi-healthy, super easy and versatile enough - you can serve it on its own, over spaghetti, over polenta, over fries, over nachos... you get the idea.


1 pound of ground turkey or chicken (or beef, )
1 can of black or pinto beans
1 jar of your favorite salsa
between 1.5 - 2 cups of water (if you use too much and the chili turns out too soupy, you can thicken it with some instant mashed potato flakes)
your favorite chili toppings - shredded cheese, diced green onions, sour cream

Dump all ingredients into the crockpot, stir to mix and break up the meat and cook on low for 7-8 hours or high for 3-4 hours.

Thanksgiving in August

Okay, I'll say it - I love Thanksgiving. It's like the Super Bowl of cooking for me, I plan for weeks and cook for days. I love and hate that it's only one day a year.

This was yet another of my what-was-cheap-at-the-grocery-store recipes.


1 pound of ground turkey or chicken
1 box of stuffing, prepared and cooled off
hamburger buns
hamburger toppings of your choice

In a big bowl, mix the ground turkey with the cold stuffing, form into 4 - 6 patties and grill or fry until it reaches an internal temperature of 160 (or until it's done). These are best served with cranberry sauce on top and a side of mashed potatoes.

(not pictured: - a burger, one that doesn't especially look all that good, but it's yummy, I swear)

Thanksgiving in July

Sometimes I go grocery shopping at one of those discount grocery stores, one of those places that sometimes has really cool stuff and that yummy greek yogurt for cheap, but sometimes they have nothing but frozen shrimp pasta and weird gluten-free waffles. Aaaaaanyway, I went there the other day and they had some of boxed stuffing with dried cranberries in it (for some reason, I love fruit in savory dishes), which is always a fast and easy side dish and why do I have to wait until November to have it? So I grabbed a box of it (which turned out to be a box of stuffing with apples in it - which is fine, it's still fruit, you know?).

Of course, I know that the grocery industry thinks if you want to eat turkey at any time that ISN'T the holidays, you must be rich and can afford to pay a trillion dollars for it, so I picked up some ground turkey, too (and a packet of turkey gravy because I cannot make gravy to save my life).


1 lb of ground turkey
1 egg
bread crumbs (if necessary)
1 packet of turkey gravy
Thanksgiving-esque spices (poultry seasoning, salt, pepper, celery seed, garlic)
1 box of stuffing mix and/or some instant mashed potatoes (or homemade stuffing or homemade mashed potatoes, but we're going for speed here)

Turn on the oven to 350
Dump the turkey, egg, bread crumbs and spices of your choice into a bowl, mix it up and form into meatballs. Bake them on a cookie sheet for about 15-20 minutes (or until done - I don't know, I don't really set a timer or anything)

While those are baking, prepare the stuffing and/or mashed potatoes and the gravy.

Serve the meatballs on top of the stuffing with a light blanket of gravy.


(not pictured: meatballs, stuffing and gravy - you've seen all of this stuff before)

All-Purpose Pork

I call it "All-Purpose Pork" because this just cooks it and makes it super tender, but it can go into nearly any meal depending on the spices you choose to add to it - add some barbecue sauce and it makes great pulled sandwiches, add some pico de gallo and corn tortillas and it's carnitas, chop it up in some fried rice and it's pork fried rice... do you have the idea yet?

1 big lump of pork (either a pork roast or a package of pork stew meat, whichever is cheaper)
+/- 1 cup of orange juice
+/- 1 cup of cola (not diet)

Toss all 3 into a crock pot and cook the hell out of it until the pork falls apart (5-6 hours on low, 3-ish hours on high) - season and/or accessorize it as you see fit.

(not pictured: a lump of pork floating in brownish liquid in a crockpot, cooked or uncooked, it looks anything but appetizing - it's super yummy, though)